From Abhorrence to Success

Most of the time, I want things to happen the way they are supposed to happen. That does not mean that I fear spontaneity. Actually, it is the opposite. I run to adventure and hope that it brings me what I expect from life—the belief that if I go on that random journey, I will have that exotic experience that changes my life or at least spices it up some. After all, is that not how life is supposed to be? College kids run to Miami, Panama City, and Cancun every year during Spring Break in pursuit of an experience that they are suppose to have. Then, during the summers, we go after whatever internship we can find in hopes that it will lead us to the career that we feel like we are supposed to take on. We see a life that has been already scripted in movies, television, and the lives of older people we admire, and we want to copy that life and paste it to our futures. But, is this really a bad thing?

What if doing what we are supposed to do makes us successful in the long run? Maybe, our efforts would not be in vain. More importantly, what is success? Success is a subjective term that can appear in many forms to many people; some positive, some negative. However, although the resulting success will differ from situation to situation, the journey required get to success is usually the same. It’s funny. As a kid, I used to hear the whole, “hard work pays off” rhetoric almost everywhere I went, but I would see people who simply got lucky or were born with it succeed while hard workers suffered. So, I questioned this whole idea of labor and fruit bearing. It was not until I got older that I realized that almost all of those people, who I thought had gotten lucky or the “success gene”, were working hard just like those people suffering. Actually, most of the time they were working harder, and if they were not working harder, they were working smarter. Therefore, success is the result of hard and smart labor.

Now, the question becomes, “Is doing what is smart the same as doing what one is supposed to do?” I think we can answer this one with relative ease, but if not, go back to early or mid 19th Century Southern America and ask a slave guided by the crack of a whip if doing what he or she was supposed to do equated the type of smart labor that equaled success. Maybe on a mere and superficial level, the answer is yes, but if we focus on a timeless moral code, the answer is a whopping no. And, if you are not much of a history person, look at it from an economical perspective. The years 2007 and 2008 were the worst fiscal years for the United States since the Great Depression in the 1920’s. During these eight quarters of economic apocalypse, we had thousands, maybe even millions, of people lose their jobs, homes, scholarships, and hopes. The worst part about it is that people lost everything by doing what they were supposed to do—take out loans for a house, a car, or nice clothes. It was as if Uncle Sam went to Wall Street and became more thorough with his command, “I want you”;therefore, the spirit continued to say “to take on debt until you drown in it” because that is the American Way—that is what people were supposed to do.

So, if our time shows us a negative outcome, then why do we continue to look for the things that we are supposed to? That one is easy. It is because there are people who do indeed do what they are supposed to do, and this following of a predestined road leads to success for them—the guy who follows in his dads footsteps by going to school, majoring in business, and taking over the family company or the girl who goes to nursing school and works her way up the ranks of the Medical field. But, there is something that makes each story different—that paves a distinct road for each successful individual. Most often, the differences in a group of success stories are the unforeseen; the setbacks, the obstacles, and the random opportunities. Therefore, people putting the step-by-step plan to the side for a moment and stepping out into the unknown—i.e. doing what they were not supposed to do--make success stories.

Therefore, as we look at life during fragile times in which the seemingly smallest decisions will make the greatest impact on them, we should try to be brave enough to look at what is on table and realize the moments in which we must do what we are not supposed to. Former Secretary of State, Political Scientist, and Stanford Professor, Condoleezza Rice once said something along the lines of “if you are about to take a regular job somewhere but someone offers you a position to teach in China, go teach in China because there is no telling where this opportunity may take you”. There is no telling where life will take us when we realize that “destiny is more than just a destination but a journey to be shaped, shared, and remade”. People getting too caught up in what they are supposed to do is the problem. Be a part of the Solution.

OxyJon